Corrupt-A-Wish

Corrupt-A-Wish

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09/29/10 10:38 AM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted but now you are sick with food poisoning from a breakfast that consisted of sausage, ham, bacon, pancakes, grits, hashbrowns, an omelet and toast. I wish my hair was easier to straighten.
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09/29/10 9:35 AM
Kexinator member Me > You Joined: 04/25/10 Location: England Posts: 695	Granted, but it is no longer on your head. I wish I knew what to write for this essay.
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09/29/10 10:50 AM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted but it doesn't matter cuz no one cares about how cheese molds. I wish I wasn't feeling so dizzy
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10/02/10 3:07 PM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. Now you feel like you can't move a muscle. I wish I had photoshop.
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10/02/10 3:26 PM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted, but you'll be arrested because it's a pirated copy I wish I had a Therapist
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10/04/10 9:56 AM
LisaM. member Joined: 04/13/08 Posts: 7,295	Granted, but the therapist is more fucked up than you. I wish life didn't come with husbands who make you wish you'd never married them in the first place.
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10/04/10 10:08 AM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted. Now they just beat you to death before you have time to regret marrying them I wish I looked more like my Uncle Jon. He's a good looking guy
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10/04/10 10:10 AM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. Your Uncle Jon will commit a crime and you will be arrested instead. I wish I could kill that chicken that screams every ten seconds around sunrise.
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10/04/10 10:19 AM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted, but you'll be made an example of and go to prison for animal cruelty I wish I could find a girlfriend
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10/04/10 10:10 AM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. She's extremely ugly and annoying as fuck. You will want to break up with her but she won't let you. I wish I had a mad-hot, blind-deaf-mute girlfriend with an absolutely perfect body.
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10/04/10 3:36 PM
Xanthe member ************************* Joined: 09/03/08 Location: Transsexual Transylvania Posts: 15,377	Granted! She can still grunt and moan really loud in your ear, and she ages really quicky so those tittays soon sag like a muthafukka. I wish I had some pot.
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10/04/10 4:39 PM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted, but it comes with cocaine and you will be arrested. I wish I had a microwave.
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10/04/10 8:24 PM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted, but one day you put a still-wrapped jawbreaker in it, and when you try to bite into it it explodes in your face covering you with molten sugar, thus horribly disfiguring you for life I wish I had been able to see NIN on the Lights in the Sky and Wave Goodbye tours
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10/04/10 9:01 PM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. You just won a crappy seat where you couldn't see the band at all. I wish I could see Opeth live. And I want to be either on the floor or in one of the front rows.
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10/05/10 5:43 AM
LisaM. member Joined: 04/13/08 Posts: 7,295	Granted, but they'll get hammered before the show, then get sick to their stomachs while onstage and puke all over you. I wish I had a crystal ball.
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10/05/10 9:24 AM
DrSmithsRobot member Joined: 03/05/10 Posts: 1,204	granted, but you knocked it off the night table and broke it when you were reaching for your vibrator. i wish there were cookies instead of pop tarts.
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10/05/10 10:33 AM
LisaM. member Joined: 04/13/08 Posts: 7,295	Granted, but they're all at my house right now since I just baked the other day, so if you want some before I eat them, you better come and get 'em. I wish I had a vibrator.
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10/05/10 11:00 AM
RhettButler member Shipwrecked and Comatose Joined: 06/01/09 Location: Cardassia Prime Posts: 15,663	Granted, but it has peanut butter on it. I wish I wasn't so bored.
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10/05/10 12:21 PM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted, you are now fucking an elephant. I wish I wasn't so depressed right now.
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10/05/10 11:55 AM
RhettButler member Shipwrecked and Comatose Joined: 06/01/09 Location: Cardassia Prime Posts: 15,663	granted, but you can no longer relate to Nine Inch Nails and are now a huge High School Musical fan. I wish I wasn't so lonely all the time. Btw, being an elephant would be awesome.
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10/05/10 1:11 PM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted. You are now conjoined with a twin. I wish I could eat what I want without gaining any weight
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10/05/10 3:22 PM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted, but now you'll keep losing weight and wasting away like that guy in the Stephen King book, Thinner I wish I was in better shape
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10/05/10 4:37 PM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted, but your penis is really microscopic. I wish I had more money for this trip
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10/05/10 8:16 PM
peacenin member Goo Day I Must Say!! Joined: 11/19/08 Location: Gutterville Posts: 13,815	Granted, but you must whore yourself to street people. I wish I had like really huge feet that could crush small farm animals.
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10/06/10 8:00 AM
LisaM. member Joined: 04/13/08 Posts: 7,295	Granted, but everything will drop dead from their smell, before you even get to crush it. I wish Christmas would happen every-other year instead of annually.
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10/06/10 10:54 AM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted, but now your birthday is celebrated every other year too. I wish my nose wasn't runny
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10/06/10 10:12 AM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. Now you have diareah. I wish that Opeth would reopen their currently-defunct official forum on opeth.com, not Ultimate Metal. (Most people on the Ultimate Metal forum are kvlt as fvck and complete assholes who are most likely responsible for causing it to close)
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10/06/10 10:27 AM
The_Prowler member Now I'm nothing... Joined: 05/02/08 Location: Fredericksburg Vagina Posts: 18,623	Granted, but now it's full of nothing but trolls I wish I wasn't so damn cold right now
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10/06/10 10:35 AM
patrick_nicholas member Former New Yorker Joined: 05/06/09 Location: Blackwater Park Posts: 43,571	Granted. Now you are on fire. I wish I could go out and do stuff more often.
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10/06/10 11:36 AM
Suge member Turbo Cunt Joined: 11/26/07 Location: The Rezervation Posts: 41,156	Granted, but you get hit by a bus. I wish I could poop
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