Corrupt-A-Wish
 
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03/28/11 6:41 PM

KMOS92 posted:
I wish I could find my phone charger.

Granted, but you just lost your phone.




I wish I had a burger right now.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/28/2011 06:42PM by patrick_nicholas.

 

03/28/11 9:09 PM

Granted, but its only one from White Castle.


I wish I could jump higher.

 

03/28/11 9:10 PM

lighthand posted:
Granted, but its only one from White Castle.


I wish I could jump higher.

Hey, I love White Castle!

Anyway, you jump straight into the sun.

I wish I could read.

 

03/28/11 9:47 PM

KMOS92 posted:
lighthand posted:
Granted, but its only one from White Castle.


I wish I could jump higher.

Hey, I love White Castle!

Anyway, you jump straight into the sun.

I wish I could read.

Kyle, those things are murder burgers man!!!(they kill your stomach)

Granted, but you can only read Latin.

I wish I could play every musical instrument.

 

03/28/11 10:11 PM

Granted, but you suck at all of them.

I wish I could go without sleep.

 

03/29/11 9:32 AM

granted, your eyelids are sown open

i wish that my dumbass teacher would suddenly combust next hour

 

03/29/11 9:43 AM

Granted, but you get burned alive because the principal has just accused you of witchcraft.



I wish I had super strength.

 

03/29/11 11:37 AM

Granted, but only in one finger.

I wish I could be in a successful rock band and drop out of school.

 

03/29/11 1:04 PM

Granted, but you will die of a massive drug overdose in a hotel room while you were pleasuring yourself in the closet during an auto-erotic asphyxiation experiment

I wish I had a watch like the one in the (terrible) movie Clockstoppers that would speed up my molecular structure to much that I would be moving so fast that time would appear to have stopped around me



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/29/2011 01:04PM by The_Prowler.

 

03/29/11 1:47 PM

The_Prowler posted:
I wish I had a watch like the one in the (terrible) movie Clockstoppers that would speed up my molecular structure to much that I would be moving so fast that time would appear to have stopped around me


granted, but your arms were removed during a rectumoscopy when the surgeon had flashbacks & you have nowhere to wear the watch.

i wish symmetry was less important on the human face, eyes on both sides of the nose would be cool.

 

03/29/11 6:37 PM

Granted, But in your top left eye your near sided,your bottom right eye is farsighted
your bottom left is super sensitive to light and your top right eye's cornea needs surgery.


I wish limb and organ cybernetics where a reality already...

 

03/29/11 8:01 PM

Granted .. you now have a stranger's head.

I wish .. for a world with no war.

 

03/29/11 8:59 PM

Granted. Now there is a world with international struggles, conflicts, and "policing actions."

I wish my laundry would do itself.

 

03/29/11 9:44 PM

granted, but it all shrinks

I wish I could sleep in late tomorrow.

 

03/31/11 9:39 PM

Granted .. but you miss the weekend.

I wish .. I had a time machine so I can go back and watch all the killer shows in the history of rock and roll.

 

03/31/11 9:46 PM

Granted, but the shows literally gang up and kill you.




I wish the warm weather would get to fucking New York already.

 

03/31/11 9:53 PM

Granted, but it's a 30 day heatwave.


I wish I didn't have splinters in my fingers.

 

03/31/11 9:56 PM

Granted, but you have splinters in your ass.





I wish it was Sunday already and I have the $25 my mother owes me so I could buy the new Amon Amarth album.

 

03/31/11 10:05 PM

Granted, But it's sold out everywhere.



I wish my friends would bring food to the house when they comeover (freakin freeloaders!).



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2011 10:06PM by lighthand.

 

03/31/11 10:16 PM

Granted .. but they hand you the grocery receipt and ask to be reimbursed.

I wish .. I had a big bacon cheeseburger.

 

03/31/11 10:39 PM

Granted, but you have a heart attack as well.

I wish I had less work to do.

 

04/01/11 8:20 AM

KMOS92 posted:

I wish I had less work to do.



granted, but the work you are doing now is to pick food particles out of the teeth of corpses in funeral homes.

i wish a local funeral home shared a building with a sandwich shop to see if people would still buy cold cuts.

 

04/01/11 8:30 AM

Granted, and people will be just dying to get in to that place. thumbs up



I wish I could figure out somewhere to go on vacation this summer.

 

04/01/11 10:10 AM

Granted, but it rains your entire vacation.

I wish I weren't so lazy lately.

 

04/01/11 3:09 PM

Granted, but now your a motivational speaker.


I wish Flat screen TV's weren't so expensive...

 

04/01/11 3:33 PM

Granted, but once you buy it a new kind of cooler tb comes out.

I wish I had a money-growing tree

 

04/01/11 3:33 PM

Granted, but once you buy it a new kind of cooler tb comes out.

I wish I had a money-growing tree

 

04/01/11 9:19 PM

Granted, but it only grows Rupees.


I wish I had some Cheez-Its to snack on...

 

04/06/11 7:16 PM

Granted .. Ass flavored Cheez-its.

I wish .. I had hookers and blow.

 

04/07/11 7:28 AM

Granted, but the hookers are all 92 and riddled with STD's
and the blow is liberally peppered with ricin.

I wish I hadn't made a pigs arse of this post.



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 04/07/2011 10:19AM by outer.veil.nomad.

 
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