Greetings,

I hope this finds you well wherever you may be. It's now several days after our final show. What a night that was! What an intense run that whole farewell tour was, in fact. A lot of emotion and energy condensed into a short time period.

Words cannot describe my gratitude and amazement at the outpouring of appreciation, thank you's, support for future endeavors, etc. that I/we have been getting. It is overwhelming. THANK YOU.

I had let it slip out on Twitter recently that I was in the hospital with my Mom during this whole experience, and rather than be mysterious, I thought it might be in some ways helpful, mostly to me, to explain in further detail.

After unexplained extreme pain for months that continued to worsen, we got my Mom to the hospital about two weeks ago. After a staggering array of deep testing and consultation, we found the cause: she has been diagnosed with multiple myeloma, which is, to oversimplify, a blood cancer. Her case is considered stage III, the most advanced. It is not considered curable per se, it's more about mitigating symptoms. In addition to her pain, unfortunately this cancer has a wide array of other symptoms plaguing her, which are all compounded by her pre-existing ailment (multiple sclerosis). My family and I are currently considering treatment options, and in the meantime, doing everything possible to keep her comfortable.

This diagnosis was made on the 10th, the day of our final show. So that day was intense and challenging for me...walking in to soundcheck was a surreal experience. Prior to that, I had certainly been pulled in two directions for a few weeks now, i.e. having these family concerns while also taking care of my work with NIN.

Playing "In This Twilight" (while exhausted after everything that preceded it) was particularly heavy duty. Phew. (Read those lyrics).

Yet, through it all, doing the shows was of immense value to me, and I was "there" 100%. Not only were all the gigs therapeutic, but they were simply such special occasions that one couldn't help but be swept away in the awesomeness of it all.

Anyway, I really didn't write this here to gain sympathy or commiserations. If you'd like to have a personal, positive thoughts/prayers/meditations (choose your flavor) about my Mom, that's always great for someone in trouble. But the real purpose of this is twofold: not only to have some small relief by letting it out, but also to explain and apologize for any perceived "distance" or "shortness" from me if you encountered me before or after any of these final shows. That's not normally my style, but circumstances were unique, as you can now hopefully understand.

You have all been so good to me.

Talk with you down the road...

Be well,
Justin



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 11:23PM by justin_mj.

I just wanted to let you know that you and your family are in my prayers.

It takes incredibly strength to play a show after hearing news of that nature, to pull off what you did, you truely are an strong person. I pray for the best.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 01:25PM by cadair8.

Wishing you and your family the best.

Reading your post has welled up my eyes. I will keep your mother and family in my thoughts and I wish from the bottom of my heart that everything goes well.

You are one of the most gracious people I have ever "met", even though I never had the chance to meet you in person, besides seeing you on stage. You took the time to reply to my messages and I appreciate it so much. No one can deny your kindness and sweetness. All my friends that got to meet you have nothing but good words for you. NIN was lucky to have you as a musician and a person.

All the best for you and your family.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 02:45PM by savagestar.

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum, Justin. She will be in my thoughts, along with you and your loved ones.

Ta for checking in--it's always good to hear from you, even under such circumstances. And thank you for truly rocking out on this tour and helping to make the two shows that I got to see (Manchester and London) an experience I'll never forget. We're all bummed that the tour has been put to bed indefinitely, but there are obviously exciting things afoot in the NIN camp and hopefully we'll get to see a lot more of you and the guys in future!

You and your mother are in my thoughts and prayers, Justin. Thank you for doing all that you have done in the NIN community; I certainly won't soon forget the time you took to acknowledge a concern of mine after the Vegas show in '08, or the thoughtfulness you had responding to everyone's messages and questions in the various threads you made over time.

You are, without a doubt, one of the sweetest, most gracious and talented musicians out there, and your contributions to NIN as a musical entity have been beyond wonderful. I know it sounds like I'm kissing ass here, but I mean what I say. I'm so glad to have been a fan during these past few "eras", and I genuinely wish the best for you and your family. May your mother recover smoothly from what she's been through, at least the best that she can.

*e-hugs*

Oh, and by the way, you and the band kicked ass at the Wiltern - I couldn't imagine getting that kind of news right before such a crucial show and not breaking down mid-performance. I admire your strength and your will. Again, thank you for such a mind-blowing show.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 02:45PM by Yoshata.

For some reason i appreciate that you can see the music of NIN as a fan too.
But Justin whatever happens remember that everything happens for a reason and that we will never be alone as long as we have something to believe in.
My Best wishes are with everything involving you and your family.
Thank you for being such a nice guy to the NIN community and for being you.

Justin, thank you for an amazing experience touring with NIN. You emanate kindness and professionalism, and I'm sorry you're going through something so terrible. Your family will be in all of our prayers, and I hope everything works out for the best.

It was an honor seeing you four perform so energetically night in and night out, battling illnesses and personal problems. Thank you for always giving each show 110%, and giving us all the time of our lives.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 03:14PM by cnagle724.

Thank you for an amazing show, and my thoughts and prayers will be with you mom. im sorry to hear about about, and best wishes to your family.

justin_mj posted:

Greetings,

I hope this finds you well wherever you may be. It's now several days after our final show. What a night that was! What an intense run that whole farewell tour was, in fact. A lot of emotion and energy condensed into a short time period.

Words cannot describe my gratitude and amazement at the outpouring of appreciation, thank you's, support for future endeavors, etc. that I/we have been getting. It is overwhelming. THANK YOU.

I had let it slip out on Twitter recently that I was in the hospital with my Mom during this whole experience, and rather than be mysterious, I thought it might be in some ways helpful, mostly to me, to explain in further detail.

After unexplained extreme pain for months that continued to worsen, we got my Mom to the hospital about two weeks ago. After a staggering array of deep testing and consultation, we found the cause: she has been diagnosed with multiple myeloma, which is, to oversimplify, a blood cancer. Her case is considered stage III, the most advanced. It is not considered curable per se, it's more about mitigating symptoms. In addition to her pain, unfortunately this cancer has a wide array of other symptoms plaguing her, which are all compounded by her pre-existing ailment (multiple sclerosis). My family and I are currently considering treatment options, and in the meantime, doing everything possible to keep her comfortable.

This diagnosis was made on the 10th, the day of our final show. So that day was intense and challenging for me...walking in to soundcheck was a surreal experience. Prior to that, I had certainly been pulled in two directions for a few weeks now, i.e. having these family concerns while also taking care of my work with NIN.

Playing "In This Twighlight" (while exhausted after everything that preceded it) was particularly heavy duty. Phew. (Read those lyrics).

Yet, through it all, doing the shows was of immense value to me, and I was "there" 100%. Not only were all the gigs therapeutic, but they were simply such special occasions that one couldn't help but be swept away in the awesomeness of it all.

Anyway, I really didn't write this here to gain sympathy or commiserations. If you'd like to have a personal, positive thoughts/prayers/meditations (choose your flavor) about my Mom, that's always great for someone in trouble. But the real purpose of this is twofold: not only to have some small relief by letting it out, but also to explain and apologize for any perceived "distance" or "shortness" from me if you encountered me before or after any of these final shows. That's not normally my style, but circumstances were unique, as you can now hopefully understand.

You have all been so good to me.

Talk with you down the road...

Be well,
Justin

So sorry to hear about the circumstances in the last shows for you. Your performance, however, was/is always flawless. Fantastic work and many thanks for putting in all you do. You put many other contemporary musicians to shame.

Thank you for sharing. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time. We'll all be here waiting for you when you're ready to rock our worlds once again. :-)

justin_mj posted:

Playing "In This Twighlight" (while exhausted after everything that preceded it) was particularly heavy duty. Phew. (Read those lyrics).

No kidding. As you left the stage, you definitely broke some water gates on the rail.

Hopefully everything works out for you and your family, Justin.

Cheers.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/13/2009 03:53PM by Shitfuckdamn.

Justin - Very sorry to hear about your Mom's diagnosis. Your Mom will be in many of our prayers and you and your family pull through together in this tough time.

Was amazing to see this final performance with you and I am glad the shows helped you therapeutically (the same way NIN songs have helped many of us through such strong times).

We love your work and will continue to follow you on whatever path you take next musically - but now - spend some time with your Mom and family. And thanks again for sharing with us.

Mickey

Thank you for sharing. I'm sending strenght your way. My father has a blood cancer as well. It's treatable, but really hard for us, the family to keep our hopes up. Hopefully, your mother and my father will get better, as they should. Be strong and never give up hopes. Here's some more ninnie love for you! *hugs*

I wish your mom and your family all the best. even after getting the dreaded news you were still amazing up on stage. Thank you for the amazing show!!

take care